UGH.

1/19/10

This post has no structure, and I don't care.


This is such an emotional dilemma. When my cat meows at me, usually it means he's hungry. He used to eat all the time. Now he doesn't eat at all.

He's stick thin, and we're putting him to sleep in a mere 4 hours. He won't eat. His blood cell count is low. He had a thyroid problem.

He is on medicine for the thyroid. The vet wants to put him on an IV. What kind of cat would want to live on an IV?

I don't know if he is in pain or not. I WISH I knew what he was saying to me. I've gotten him to eat a bit in the last day. He asks for food, but when I pour it out and place it down next to him, he turns his nose at it.

What am I supposed to do? Time is running out, and with him occasionally eating, I can't help but wonder if he's trying to show me he can get better. But what if he's hurting I don't want him to keep suffering. How the HELL am I supposed to figure this out?

What a goddamn motherfucking struggle. I do not get it.